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Am I Supposed to Feel this Way?

Wordcatcher Publishing




Adopting a child impacts on the whole family

This is the story of seven-year-old Oliver, a birth child, whose parents adopt a little baby called Max. 

For Oliver this initially seemed to be everything he always wanted, but he soon discovers not everything was as he first imagined!

More often than not, we realise birth children can suffer secondary trauma with having an adopted sibling. This book enables parents to sit with their children to discuss the possible issues that may arise when having an adopted sibling placed. It can also help children who already have an adopted sibling to understand what might be going on for them, and that they are not alone in feeling the way they do.

This book has been written specifically for children to write and draw in, and to personalise as their own. They are encouraged to express themselves as much as they wish!

This book is suitable whether you are in the middle of the adoption process, having your child placed or even if you are just thinking about whether adoption is right for you and your family.

Your allocated social worker can also use this book to work with your child to help prepare them for the journey ahead.

Please remember this book is just one childs experience, and children will have different experiences, but what this book does is to open up conversation with your child to help them to express their emotions.

From a child's perspective

This is a book about me! Oliver! When Mum and Dad were adopting Max, there werent many books out there for me to read. Some books were aimed at older children and my parents didnt think they were appropriate for me to read.

I would have loved a book to have been just for me; where I could read what adoption CAN actually be like for birth children. I wish Id have known how hard it could be at times and how emotional Id feeleven now! Im 10 years old now and would not change my brother for the world, even though he can still be a pain at times!!!

Illustrations by Martine Cucciniello

Customer Reviews ()


Liz from . A brilliant book about adoption from a child's perspective. Cleverly written so that children can easily read it and relate to the feelings and issues of adopting a younger sibling. It provides understanding,comfort and encouragement for those tricky times and expresses the excitement and huge fulfilment of welcoming a new child and settling them into the family. Fantastic down-to-earth and practical read for both adults and children!

Barry from London. We were recommended this book by a family friend and it’s a very interesting read indeed – it is seen through the eyes of a birth child of a family who have adopted another child. It’s very well written, with clear explanatory notes and illustrations with ample room for the birth child to express their own feelings by drawing or writing. A very good book for those looking to or have already adopted a child.

Richard Ian Coates from . This book is written to be a tool to support children as adopted siblings join their family. I would recommend it to adoptive parents as it will assist them as they prepare a child for the new addition and all the uncertainty and new experiences that can bring. Parents can read through the book and use is as a prompt to start conversations about sensitive issues such as why children are adopted, what the process is, challenges over sharing time and possessions and the changes that a new adopted sibling can bring as well as the new visitors that might come too. The book encourages colouring in and participation as the topics are explored in a age appropriate manner. This is a good book that will assist many families as they welcome a new addition to there family while assist their older children with the transition. I was given the book free to review

Therapist from . This is a great book for birth children to be taken through –by an adult - to help them understand the process of an adopted child joining their family. As a therapist working with adoptive families I know the (understandable) conflicting feelings that birth children have at different times. This book emphasises that it is ok to have lots of different feelings, there are opportunies to draw different feelings faces and questions at the end for children to consider. This is a book I will definitely recommend to parents and social workers.

Social Worker from . A must read for all families with birth children who are considering adoption. The book is informative, interactive and a great tool to use with birth children to help them to prepare for the adoption process and for a child being placed with their family. Very well written by an experienced adoptive parent with a birth child. As an Adoption Social Worker I have already recommended this book to my prospective adoptive families and I will continue to do so in order to ensure that birth children are given an opportunity to express their views, feelings and any worries they may have about adoption.

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